My friends are kidding me about juggling three men. All three men know that I am dating other people. I am not making this a secret. There is nothing wrong with dating multiple people at the same time as long as you don’t lead them on.
When I am not available to go on a date, each of them gets concerned that I am out with one of the other guys. They might feel like they are on that show: The Bachelorette, where a woman is dating 20+guys at the same time. They all know about each other. This is not my intent. Dating several men at a time has kept me from getting overly excited about one guy, finding out he and I don’t have a match and then starting all over again. That is a roller-coaster ride.
Yep! The field is narrowing. I am not in a hurry to get into a relationship at this time, but one of the men I have been dating is standing out in the crowd. So far, I like what I see.
It is really nice when you talk for hours and hours and there aren’t a whole lot of awkward pauses. We are beginning to open up and share more about our lives, experiences, and values.
In the early stages of dating, you are just seeing if someone might have a little spark…that chemistry thing! When I am teaching my dating classes, I am right up front and say that if you don’t have chemistry, the relationship probably will not withstand the test of time. Chemistry is the glue. When things get tough, chemistry and communication will get you through. We have chemistry!
So, we are well past stage ONE! But he just got his first kiss this week! Really, he just got his first kiss from me. He must have liked it cause he mentioned it a few times or maybe he waited so long for me to give him a real kiss…he might be hoping to let me know that he liked it so I will kiss him again!
We had a date set up the day Ashley and I went shopping at Victoria Secrets. He told me to call him after we were done. Well, there were over 200 crazed women fighting over bras and panties, a two-hour wait to purchase and the afternoon just disappeared. We did not end up going on a date, but he was very kind about it. (He teases me when we make a date. He wants to know that I am not going shopping before, but other than that, he was pretty understanding!) He did take the opportunity to tell me that he is hopeful to see some of my new purchases from Victoria Secret. It took this long for him to get a kiss! Victoria Secret modeling will be a while.
Blue-eyes and I are in Stage Two of dating. This is where you start to see whether you might have connection in other parts of your life. Other than just chatting all day, what the heck might you do together? Travel, photography, spiritual connection, what kind of foods do you like or dislike? Okay, so he doesn’t like sushi and I love sushi. Not a deal killer. (Note to all my friends: If I end up with Blue-Eyes, lunch together will be sushi!)
Until later! This is my dating update.
Jeannine Kaiser
America’s Dating and Relationship Expert, Author of Cupid’s Playbook
100datestoamazing 